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assignment corrections

by | Nov 30, 2023 | questions

Hi, I need you to look over my assignment for me and check to see what is wrong and correct them for me. there is my teacher comments on attached please correct it, but don’t change a lot. i really want to get high grade ih this assignment.

Thank you.

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EPP110000 Which assignment is this? E3 first or final draft?
April 30, 2013
Are we dependent on computers?
[I had an easy task to pick a topic on this essay since]Omit. Try not to use “I” “me” “my” etc in this essay. we live in the 21st century, where pretty much everything is based on computers. I mean we just have to look around while we walk on campus to one class from another. People are carrying and using their phones, tablets, laptops, and all these amazing accessories. It doesn’t really matter if it is for entertainment purposes or business use. People use them. We all bond and belong to these computer based things in some way. If computers wouldn’t be around us and around companies, then we and companies wouldn’t be that successful in many ways.This essay should be left-margined, not centered!
Keep with first paragraph. This is still introduction. Mainly computers run most of the modern world of the 21st century. It is actually really hard to find any electronics, that doesn’t have any kind of computer chip in it. It has the benefits of making our life easier and simple, but, should computers run our life? Where is the roadmap for your topics in the Body paragraphs?
Computers are essential part of our life for both entertainment and business purposes. The internet or World Wide Web is also a huge advantage of the computers. The internet provides quick access towards any questions that we have in mind or either if we just would like to talk to a beloved family member, watch a video, or to follow the news.
Computer has the freedom, people would and want to take advantage on it Did you do the grammar check? Review/ ABC?. Using the computers to do various tasks can be really good thing and helping us people on many ways. I think about the computers as it frees up the human mind, to be more creative and effective in different ways. We don’t have to spend all our free time organizing and looking and trying to find for information. Computers gave…

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